Sunday, June 24, 2012


My Sam has been extra difficult at times lately, anyone who reads here knows the challenges we have seen the last few weeks. Something else is emerging however. Something AMAZING. He has started hugging me! They are still  out of the blue without warning. They are still random and completely unexpected. Regardless of when or where or even why they are happening...

I am still getting REAL hugs from Sammy.

Sometimes I forget where the real deficits lay because he talks so much, because of his behaviors, and because I spend so much time focused on fixing the negative stuff. It's so hard to see the stuff that isn't there, until it is actually there. It's hard to prove a negative right? So i often forget where we fall short because if it isn't there it isn't in my face. I didn't realize I wasn't being hugged until I was.

This may disappear. This may be gone in an instant. I want to hold it so tightly in my hand that no one even knows it's there. I want to stop time and never let it move forward. At an age where a lot of boys are starting to think hugging mom is "uncool" my boy has just started. He wraps his arms around me and buries his head in my neck. He snuggles in close and melts into me. He hugs me as though we are the only people in the world at that very moment. When my boy hugs me, I assure you... we are.