Thursday, May 31, 2012

Autism and the Sun

Many years ago autism was my sun. My entire world revolved around it. I ate slept and breathed it. Autism  ate me from the inside. It was like my own personal zombiepocolypse! I couldn't go a moment without it intruding onto my thoughts, my heart and even my dreams. It was the center of my universe.

That was a lifetime ago. It isn't that way anymore. It is now just a moon trailing around my lazy little planet full of chaos. It's there, but it only comes out when it is dark. it hides when I am not looking at it. Sometimes i forget it's there. Until it gets dark and then all bets are off.

I look forward to the day when it's just a distant twinkling in the sky of some far off star. When the moons around my little planet are just my babies.


But until then I watch the moon each night as it waxes and wanes. I sit in silent awe of the beauty and stillness that can surround it. I listen and I feel and I hope and I dream. I know that even if it is always so close I can taste it, that it will all be more than ok. Because this... this is my life, my world and I say so.

I can't help but smile at my boy when he gives me his goofy grin, just like the man on the moon. He's there even if you cant always see him