Wednesday, March 7, 2012

I am That Mom Too

 I read THIS at Things I Can't Say I sat for a few minutes before I could even respond. You see it is so hard to type a reply when you have tears in your eyes.

I am that mom too, and  I know it.

I use to be the one who thought "I would never let my child speak that way"  I think I may have patted myself on the back a few times thinking I was good at this parenting thing. Then along came Sammy and he changed the game.

I realize now I have no clue what I am doing.

Sammy can be (and often is) the most amazing loving sweet child. He leans on me and kisses me without warning. He loves me, I know he does. When Sammy gets mad all bets are off. I have been called vile, horrible things. Words I have discovered were learned when the older child put music on my iPod. It takes everything I have to not loose it in those moments, because lets be real here, Sam is a child with such a limit on his understanding. I have begun telling him that it hurts my feelings. He seems so shocked by that every time.

Everyday at least once, he tells me he hates me, that I am a moron. He wants a new mommy, I am a bi***. People stare, they comment, they intervene.
Guess what ? I know you are trying to be helpful. I know you mean well. Please, You aren't helping. If you see me or another mom like me, don't offer advice, offer chocolate or wine. If you aren't going to give me a vacation for free then please don't give me that look that says "poor you". Do not tell me I need to spank him, scold him, call the police, parent better, parent more, parent less,jump up and down , spit wooden nickles or say prayers in Latin. The truth is It isn't me, it's him.
I can handle it. I handle it every day, before you and after you. You have no idea what I deal with on a daily basis. Be grateful the child has pants on. A year ago that may have not been the case. This too shall pass and we will be on to something else.