Friday, May 24, 2013
I have six children.
I love being a mother.
Some days, I feel so out of my depth. Some days, I skate into the home stretch of children in bed and quiet in the house. It's nights like tonight where I can only think " My God , I have to do this again tomorrow"
Thankfully those days aren't often, but they happen.
Today was awesome, tonight was a challenge.
Nate went up to tell Sam dinner was ready. Everyone had a great day. Nate went to field day, Sam had a friend over for a little while. Sam was half asleep when Nate went to get him for dinner. So Sam punched him, Nate cried which infuriated Sam more. Then Sammy pummeled Nate, AJ intervened and Sam escalated, then Ty intervened and I removed everyone and dealt with it. It was brutal, and ugly, and one of those moments that make me think that perhaps I am not a very good parent.
It's a challenge.
And some days it just sucks.
So tonight I will have a glass of wine. I will thank God for my blessings, for my trials, for the ups and the downs and for the little time that I get as their mom. When babies are born it feels like every day takes forever, but I promise you that if you just blink a little too long, they are 18.
It's kind of like a roller coaster. You wait in line, you get strapped into the car, you are so scared of the drop and the loops but before you know it the ride is over and all you have is the memory of it.
Tonight I will go to sleep.
In the morning I will do it all over again. I just hope tomorrow ends on an up-note.